Are you dealing with toxic words?

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Ever had someone dump their garbage, their insecurity, their jealousy on you? I’m not talking about an argument, but I’m referring to toxic words dumped like upturned and scattered garbage on your lawn, only worse. I’m talking about toxic words that berated, belittled and scarred you. Words that triggered fears and doubts that were already festering in the dark recesses of your heart. Maybe, you knew better, so you simply refused the garbage. Hurray! I am so proud of you.

Would you prefer to listen to the teaching?

But maybe you listened to the poisonous words

toxic, poisonous words and you believed them when they were spoken to you. So, you gathered the toxic words in large, sturdy bags and carefully, carefully him them in a closet in your mind, so no one would ever know. You hid the garbage, because you were afraid and ashamed that someone might see the nasty garbage that labeled you.

Maybe they are words that were spoken to you years ago, maybe even as a child, but you still have that bag of toxic words. Maybe the toxic words were spoken in anger or maybe they weren’t intended to be toxic to you at all, but they are toxic to you! A verbal spewing can burn as bad as hot grease from a skillet. If you don’t deal with them they will poison your attitude and they can even make you sick. So what do you do? 

Does their toxic words trigger your insecurity?

I want to tell you about what I saw!

When I want to relax, really relax, I go to Pinterest. As I was glancing through the pins on my feed, a picture of a woman grabbed me.

You could see something extraordinary in her face.

It wasn’t anger.

or meanness.

It was finality.

DETERMINATION!

And what her face didn’t say, her body did. 

Her shoulder was turned away and her hand extended out and beyond her body like a traffic cop stopping traffic at a school crossing.

I lingered, mesmerized by the strength I saw in her face. I couldn’t help but wonder how she got that kind of courage. Was the strength cultivated or did it bubble up spontaneously?

There’s something special about courage

  • Intimidated people…
  • fearful…weak people…
  • powerless people…
  • absolutely love that kind of courage!

That kind of tenacity. 

The firm-footed tenacity that refuses, absolutely stands resolute, without outrage or red-faced disgust to accept whatever garbage is being dumped.

I don’t know about you, but I have found myself way to often accepting with wide-open arms the nasty garbage being dumped by satan. I knew it came from satan, although the delivery truck driver was a friend, a relative or a believer I trusted.

Still, they delivered repulsive toxic garbage (sometimes unintentionally and sometimes intentionally). Their toxic words left me feeling:

  • Intimidated.
  • Rejected.
  • Unworthy.
  • Shameful.
  • Worthless.
  • Fearful.

Has that happened to you too?

It stinks doesn’t it.

Way too often, after the delivery person is long gone, I find myself sifting through the mental garbage of their toxic words,

Memorizing every detail and

  • Rehearsing every word, sometimes embellishing them with my wounded emotions.
  • processing every single inflection of their voice,
  • grieving over what they said or didn’t say and what they did or did not do.

These days…I’ve learned a better way to process toxic words and deeds. 

Truth?

If there’s truth in their words, I take that truth to the cross and ask for God’s help.

There once was a woman who swallowed a lie. When you are processing toxic words, examine them for truth

Lies?

But, every other ounce that is not truth is nothing but stinking lies and I get rid of it.

Trigger?


Or, when I realize the garbage they delivered actually triggered a lie(s) in my heart.

Lies that I have believed about myself and my abilities, that

show their ugly heads and spiteful gleams of delight while I groan with pain.

Lies that trigger my

  • insecurity
  • self-consciousness
  • doubt
  • fear
  • rejection

When that happens I know it’s time to..

  • de-clutter.
  • get healing.
  • think different.

 

Your mind is not a garbage dump!

You don't have to accept someone's toxic words. You can reject because it is garbage.

You don’t have to receive rejection, fear or intimidation.

You can

  • refuse it!
  • refuse toxic words mentally and emotionally!
  • declare with finality…

No Dumping Here!

You have a choice here.

Don’t embrace it, gather it in your arms or give it a place in your heart!

It begins with knowing who you are.

You are chosen and loved. Without Him, you are incomplete. But, with Him you are whole and complete. 

And can I make this very personal?

You can refuse to accept what people say about you. Their words don't have to become toxic words in your heart.

You are priceless! Absolutely priceless.

You are not rejected, worthless, stupid, ugly or whatever else you’ve been hearing in your head.

And, you are loved…precious to God and that changes everything.

Did you hear me?

I’m in your face…

His love changes everything…

EVERYTHING!

Bask in His love!

because you are loved by God you can reject toxic words.

And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. Ephesians 3:18 NLT

He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit, 6whom He poured out upon us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7so that being justified by His grace we would be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life. Titus 3:5-7 NASB

Your mind detox continues by knowing who He is!

"O Sovereign LORD! You made the heavens and earth by your strong hand and powerful arm. Nothing is too hard for you! Lord heal my heart of toxic words

“O Sovereign LORD! You made the heavens and earth by your strong hand and powerful arm. Nothing is too hard for you! Jeremiah 32:17

Embrace His strength, instead of trying to muster your own!

Those are two great…powerful verses

              that remind me that I can access His strength.

So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the LORD your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.”Deuteronomy 31:6 NLT

As I looked at that picture of that courageous woman on Pinterest, I thought to myself, “I need to remember this. I’m gonna pin this post on my Pinterest Board.”

Then I felt a whisper in my heart,

“It’s not her determined face you need to remember…it is your-

  • face…
  • determined face…
  • set jaw…
  • rigid stance…
  • hand outstretched like a traffic cop…
  • voice

saying to the devil:

  • “No!” 
  • “I will not believe your lies anymore.”
  • “I will believe truth. God’s Word is truth and I will allow it to shape my thoughts, my beliefs and my choices.
I reject toxic words because my mind is not a garbage dump.

Big Take Away When someone dumps garbage on you, don’t accept the garbage, reject it. If any of the words are true, then take it to the cross. The words that are not true dump them. Don’t rehearse them because they are lies and they are toxic. If the toxic words trigger something in your heart, that’s a trigger it’s time to get healing and declutter the garbage. Jesus wants you whole because He love you. If you are struggling you may want to read this several times.

This article is part of a series on what the Bible says about your thoughts.

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